A Time to Vision

I've noticed a trend over the past couple of years at college, but especially since last summer: I spend a lot more time looking ahead and planning during my vacations than I do during the school year.

This conclusion is perhaps fairly self-evident. Naturally I don't have as much time during the school year to look farther ahead than the next month of my life. Once the school year gets kicked into gear, I'm always having to work on the next assignment, go to the next meeting or class, write the next paper. This is not really a situation that's conducive to thinking about what I want to do in the future, beyond the classroom. I barely have time to complete necessary applications on top of my regular work levels, let alone contemplate and plan as I would like to.

That situation has made my vacation time incredibly valuable to me, but has also somewhat increased the stress levels. I enjoy having the chance to sit back, put my feet up, and think about where I've been, where I am, and where I'd like to go, but then I have to combine that with actually making some concrete plans and...well, welcome to adulthood, I guess? My vacations have become a mixture of long-term visioning (what might I be interested in doing after I graduate, etc) and medium-term planning (where am I going to live this summer and next year).

I sometimes wonder about the impact of this need to plan ahead on my ability to live in "the now." I try not to let it take over too much, because I am a firm believer in not letting my mind get too far ahead of my life. I know too many people whose brains are already in law school or at their future company, and I wonder how much they are really enjoying where they are right now. I don't really know, but I have to speculate about how much it's really possible to be present and appreciate where you are if you are constantly looking toward the next thing. For myself, I like being an undergrad, for all the stress that can go along with that. So I take this time to vision and plan, because it's necessary and, admittedly, quite pleasant. But in a way, I am looking forward to getting back to school and diving in to the routine-- and I aim to be present enough to appreciate the first of my last three semesters of undergrad.